September 29, 2010
After the miscarriage, if you had read my previous post about my first pregnancy, I was pretty upset for the first few months. Kept thinking what was wrong with me. What have I done or didn't do enough or something that I ought to do. In between those few months, I consulted several other doctors and Chinese physicians to find out if I have a healthy womb. I was told, all the time, that I was perfectly healthy and should be able to conceive.
Before I was pregnant with my first, mum came across a lovely cross-stitch kid, a picture of a sweet baby sleeping and was covered with a blanket. She knew I love cross-stitch and got it for me. It took me only about a month to completed it, got it framed and hung it in my supposedly baby room.
After the miscarriage, quite a number of relatives, friends and colleagues came and visited me and one of them saw the picture of the baby in the room and said it could be bad omen. I am not really superstitious but since she mentioned it, at a time of grieve, I began to hate that picture. Every time I pass by that room, the picture upsets me, so I gave it away.
I was told by my gynae to wait at least six months before I try again. By the fourth month, I told myself, these grieves had gotta stop. I have to move on. In order to keep my mind busy I bought myself two more cross-stitch kits. This time, a picture of a cute chubby boy climbing a tree trying to rescue a kitten and another piece, a boy sitting on a swing. Took me only about a month to completed both. Got it framed and this time I hung it in the living room so that every night when I come home from work, I can get to look at it. It makes me happy and feels like there is hope.
You can call it fung shui, good luck charm, fated, law of attraction or even just a mere coincident. I really end up having two lovely sons. They are in their teens now. Maybe because I had been thinking and wanting two boys so badly that it became real and I am thankful and grateful about it.
Moral of the story here is never to give up hope. Keep trying, pray hard, do what you think you should do to get to where you are, and you will eventually get there. Thanks for reading and hope this inspires others. Just don't give up.
Labels: Mummy tale